Terrible But True

Terrible But True – A Visit From Mom and Dad

By on Friday, September 30th, 2011

In a night of passion and wild abandon that doesn’t bear thinking about, something happened. Biology, romance and, quite possibly, liquor worked together to create something incredible; at the moment of fertilization, two people irreversibly cross over onto an altogether different plane of perspective and understanding. They cease to be normal, interesting, exciting individuals in… »

Terrible But True – Amoebas Ate My Brain

By on Tuesday, June 21st, 2011

Dried Papaya seeds, Secnidal, Flagyl, perricone tea, cloves of raw garlic, part-time veganism, chlorinated vegetables, wearing green underwear when the moon is full, braiding the pubic hair of a mountain goat whilst performing an Irish folk ballad: I’ve tried almost everything to shift the bastards, from the hardest drugs the man in the pharmacy… »

Terrible But True – Deet, Dust and Dating

By on Monday, March 21st, 2011

The remarkably talented and adorable Anne Seymour, our former London Correspondent went loopy living in The Big Smoke and recently set upon a year-long trip to Zambia where she is working to help prevent the spread of HIV, while also attempting to date as many cute boys as possible. So, Anne, thanks again for taking… »

Terrible But True – Confidence Men

By on Thursday, December 9th, 2010

People who live in glass houses should not throw stones. And God knows, despite all the religious rubble of our colonial town, Antigua is one giant glass house full of flagrant, lawbreaking reprobates — beautiful, lawbreaking,  romantic, deranged and damaged reprobates of which most are good company and even better friends.

So it is with both… »

Terrible But True – Of History Class and Hooker Debts

By on Sunday, June 13th, 2010

When I first started working in the New York City Public Education system, my father gave me a bit of advice. He said, “Whatever you do, don’t end up on the cover of the New York Post.” Sound advice for anyone, really. Particularly if you are going to be working with minors. And the vast… »

Terrible But True – The Naturists

By on Monday, April 19th, 2010

David and I loitered anxiously, hoping someone would pick us for their team. The crowd were about to play “It’s A Knockout” and we wanted in. Straining to catch the captains’ eyes, we waited pitifully as the finger of favour pointed at people all around us. But we just weren’t wanted. I’m sure it wasn’t… »

Terrible But True – The Colonic

By on Sunday, January 24th, 2010

The building had the air of student rental, with a notion of cleanliness a touch more maverick than I’d hoped. I might be there for one of the dirtiest deeds of my life, but I wanted no smears of those who had been there before me. Questions tumbled around my mind. Was I adequately groomed… »

Terrible But True – Christmas Off The Rails

By on Thursday, December 24th, 2009
dead-santa

It was Christmas Eve in New York City, and Penn Station looked like a goddamn refugee camp. Outside, a freezing rain pelted busy streets awash in festive bunting and deadly ice patches. Inside, thousands of cold wet travelers jostled and shoved, swearing harder with each announcement of further train delays. I’d found a place to… »

Terrible But True – One Night in Bangkok

By on Tuesday, December 8th, 2009
hotdog2

When the rain comes down in Bangkok the grit and filth of Kho San Road isn’t washed away but pushed around. You wade through it as slur-pee cups and used condoms swirl around your ankles. Rats make for the high ground of dumpsters. The T-shirt sellers, trinket hawkers, prostitutes and tourists are pushed off the… »

Terrible But True – Free Range Pigeon

By on Thursday, May 14th, 2009
dead-pigeon-kevin

The pigeon trembled as I removed it from my backpack. I held it firmly, feeling its heartbeat and panicked respiration pulse between my fingers. It kept its head tucked between the raised rims of its wings and I wondered for a moment how I was going to get to its neck. I carried it into… »

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