The Surly Bartender

Just over two months ago, we all heard the same soul-gouging news from Newtown, Connecticut. In a nation that has seen more than its share of firearm-related atrocities, a crime had been committed that was so dark, so unrelentingly awful, that none of us could look away — and few of us could shake off a… full story HERE »

Captain’s Log, Stardate 050511.1. Primary Alpha One, Preparatory Exercises for the Newtral Zone War — My suspicion has grown that the other officers on this training mission may actually be insane. Don’t they understand that our prime directive is to determine the fittest, most square-jawed leader in our coming battle with the rebellious Admiral Gingrich? The… full story HERE »

The Surly Bartender has spent far too little time slinging mezcal and far too much time watching CNN International in the past few weeks and he has one burning question: Am I the only one who finds CNN International to be physically painful to watch? It’s like resting your eyeballs on a bed of nails while some… full story HERE »

A recent news story brought up some dark memories for me. As most of you will already know, the Washington Post reported in May that as a senior at The Cranbrook School, an exclusive private institution for the children of the Detroit-area elite, an 18-year-old Mitt Romney had a violent confrontation with a classmate, one John Lauber, an… full story HERE »

With a few exceptions, The Surly Bartender has held his tongue for the better part of the past year, but like a carbonated bottle of rage into which the world has dropped too many Mentos of crazy, it’s time to explode. Really, when one has to look to the Guatemalan political scene to find honesty, reason… full story HERE »

A few nights ago, while slapping shots across the hardwood at Café No Sé, a favored customer asked if the Surly Bartender would be commenting on the Occupy protests occurring, at last count, in over 200 cities through out the United States. I raised my glass, he raised his, and I said, “They’re right. End of… full story HERE »

FukUshima.

Oh, so funny . . .

I’m trying to think of something funny about the nuclear disaster unfolding in Japan. Something real ha ha, grab-your-belly, split-a-side-open funny. Because if I don’t think of something funny, I may just have to be carted off in a straight jack.

Hmmmm . . .(that’s me thinking)…. full story HERE »

The Surly Bartender is used to confronting complex issues, slicing away the extraneous bullshit and drilling into the moral, martial or material core in the amount of time it takes most mortals to drink a martini. Yet, I have to admit to being truly puzzled today. And to be so puzzled at a time when… full story HERE »

The Uncharacteristically Civil Bartender loves a good old-fashioned donnybrook, but there’s one going in Gotham City specifically, and around the United States generally, that actually has him worried. Further, the word from friends in Europe is that the same madness is brewing over there. Anti-Islamic sentiment is on the rise, even… full story HERE »

I once commented to an economist friend that “the easiest job in the world has got to be: Fellow at a Free Market Think Tank.” Really. All it takes is ONE thought, applied asshattedly to any and all situations. And that thought is this: if left on its own, the free market will solve all… full story HERE »